World’s Fastest Picnic Table
As long as men have been using gasoline engines, we have been coming up with amazing ways to make our lives more convenient, efficient, and downright bizarre. Check this out see what I’m talking about. This guy is pretty clever. Though it may look funny to go put putting down the street while sitting on your picnic table, you do get to have a few distinguished accolades. For starters, you could say you have the worlds fastest picnic table. Who would dispute that? That’s right, nobody. Second, you could say that you have the world’s most fuel-efficient picnic table. Again, you can’t argue with the truth. Finally, you could say that you have the most efficient way to picnic. There are plenty of others, just let your mind wander and you will see what I’m talking about. However, when it wanders back, let’s look at a few things that make this picnic table pretty impressive.
No, I’m not talking about mounting the 7 hp motor on the back of the picnic table to make it go. That seems to be pretty easy in and of itself. All you have to do is make sure your driveshaft and gear ratios are synced up so you have the correct transfer of power to the axles. However, it is the way this thing maneuvers that is most interesting to me. At first glance, it appears that it is a pretty easy read. This little guy is obviously controlled much like a skid steer, using the rear wheels as its form of maneuvering. However, look again and you will notice that the front wheels do all of the turning, while the rear wheels provide the power. Obviously, the front wheel is operated by a hydrostatic drive, since there is no steering wheel present.
He is using his feet to maneuver the picnic table up and down the road. This is very similar to how airplanes are steered. It’s not exact, because airplanes use more than hydrostatic drives to control steering, but pretty close. The other impressive thing is the fact that he can pop a wheelie with a picnic table and not come flying off the back. Furthermore, he can navigate it up the driveway and land safely. All of that to say, it is obviously not this guy’s first barbecue… I know bad pun, but completely intended.
Yet, as cool and “nifty” (yes I said nifty) as this horsepower-driven picnic table is, there are cons to every pro. Just take a look at a few that come to my mind: (more…)
Impress people at a family reunion. Escape from a family reunion. Take the party with you wherever you go. Drive the party away after you get tired of the people there. Impress yo
Impress people at a family reunion.
Escape from a family reunion.
Take the party with you wherever you go.
Drive the party away after you get tired of the people there.
Impress your girlfriend.
Drive it to divorce court because your wife caught you impressing your girlfriend with your picnic table.
Take your lunch to work in style.
Take your pink slip from HR home for not bringing enough seats for everyone.
Take your family to the beach and never worry about parking.
Take orders at the beach because people think you are a food stand.
Take it hunting and use it at the camp site.
Get mad at your buddies because they used it to haul their deer out of the forest.
Tell your wife you finally got her that new car she has always been wanting.
Drive it to the hospital to explain to the doc why you are sporting a black eye.
There are so many other things you could think of, I’m sure. I bet if that guy had thought a bit about it before he built it, he might have outfitted the table with wings or weapons just in case. You never know, right? It can get rough in the hood, no matter if you are living in suburbia or Compton. You have to be prepared for contingencies. Perhaps he is working on a second version and we just don’t know it.
Wait, he IS working on a second version because guys like that don’t just build one amazing contraption like a gas powered picnic table and stop. Who knows what he will come up with next? We can only dream. Maybe one with hefty hydraulics that make it bounce like a ghetto sled. Perhaps one with oversize tires for tearing up the local mud bog. Maybe he will outfit it with skis to hit the slopes while having a burger. We just don’t know. All of that to say, this picnic table wins the clever award for sure. So, what does it take to build the world’s fastest picnic table?
Well, it would seem like you need an engine with enough horsepower to haul your family down the street, a nice steel frame, good wheels, decent steering, and of course an umbrella for shade. Summer can get hot, and you need all the help you can get. Although, if it were me, I would just drive it under a shade tree and call it even, unless my in-laws were there. Then I would probably just drive away.